Relationships are complex and multifaceted. Everyone has a need to hide their weaknesses or doubts from others. This is completely natural. But how do you recognize those who are hiding the truth from you? Fake friends.
Freud argued that "the extent of someone's personality is defined by the size of the problem he can derail." This means that a person's true nature comes out when faced with stress or problems. In such situations, the masks fall and real fears and frustrations, which are usually repressed, are clearly visible. At the end, we reveal how to recognize if she is your friend - fake friend.
Real life examples
Consider the example of someone losing patience in a traffic jam. Is the person who quickly starts screaming and cursing perhaps carrying more anger and stress than meets the eye? Freud would say that it is at such moments that one's true character is revealed. The same goes for someone who resorts to physical or verbal threats during an argument - this indicates deeper unresolved issues and a lack of self-control.
Freud's theory of psychoanalysis
Freud's theory of psychoanalysis shares the human mind into the conscious and unconscious part. The conscious part includes everything that we are able to perceive, while the unconscious part hides thoughts, feelings and memories that are outside of our awareness, but nevertheless influence our behavior. Freud compared the mind to an iceberg, where we see only a small part of consciousness, and the larger part is hidden below the surface.
The unconscious mind is full of unpleasant feelings such as pain, anxiety or conflict. These repressed desires and fears play a key role in shaping our behavior and personality. For example, if someone unconsciously carries childhood anger, that anger may manifest as irritability in adulthood.
How to recognize a fake friend
- Uncontrolled outages: Observe how the person reacts to stressful situations. A false friend will quickly lose patience, become angry or even resort to threats. Such behavior indicates deep-rooted problems and the inability to control emotions
- Lack of self-control: A person who cannot control himself and often resorts to outbursts of anger or frustration is probably hiding real emotional problems. A true friend will try to control his emotions and react appropriately even in difficult situations
- Ignoring or rejecting suggestions: If a person is not ready to accept feedback or suggestions, it shows immaturity and unwillingness for personal growth. A true friend will be open to constructive criticism and will strive to improve his behavior.
Conclusion: Freud's theories, although controversial, still have a strong influence on psychology today and can help us better understand the people around us. Exploring the unconscious and observing responses in stressful situations are key to identifying a person's true character. The next time you are in doubts regarding the authenticity of a friendship - a fake friend, take a moment to observe how this person copes with stress. This can reveal more to you than you think.