To the world, he is the embodiment of an ideal, but within four walls he becomes someone else! For many, he is someone they would want by their side, until they realize that behind the perfection is an abuser!
Abuse can affect all types of women, regardless of age, education, economic status, culture, sexual orientation or physical condition.
How to recognize unhealthy relationships, violent behavior, victim manipulation techniques and what we can do when someone close to us has problems.
How to tell if you are in an unhealthy relationship?
1. The partner is jealous and possessive, does not allow you to have friends, constantly checks you, does not accept the fact that you want to end the relationship or marriage with him.
2. He tries to control you, wants to make all the decisions, does not respect your opinion.
3. You worry about how he will react to what you say or do, you are threatened.
4. He blames you for his bad behavior, saying that you provoked him, forced him to behave that way.
5. He forces you to have sex and is violent during it.
6. He argues, quickly loses control of his emotions and behavior.
What are the signs that a person is violent?
This behavior does not necessarily indicate abuse, but it is important to pay attention if the person has the following characteristics:
1. Get in and out of partnerships quickly.
2. He can be very charming and seem perfect.
3. He insists that you do not engage in any extra activities or spend time with people other than him.
4. He criticizes your appearance and belittles you.
5. He is jealous and possessive.
6. His behavior and words are inconsistent.
How can you help a person suffering from violence?
1. Support her, listen, believe her and don't judge. Show her that she is not alone.
2. Give her time to make up her own mind, don't tell her what to do and don't force her not to go back to the abuser.
3. Let her talk about the good times in the relationship, don't attack her for staying with the abuser.
4. Help her focus on the good things about her and her children, don't tell her she has to stay with the abuser because of the children.
5. Respect her privacy, keep information to yourself if she has asked you to.
6. Safety comes first, if you think she is in danger, tell her, plan with her what to do if she needs to escape urgently, don't put yourself at risk by confronting the abuser.
7. Encourage her to prepare for an emergency leaving home, help her prepare things she will need, such as credit cards, money, bank statements, passports, birth certificates, IDs, apartment keys, medicine, clothes, toys for children.
What can you say to a person who is in such a relationship?
1. Give her a clear message that there is no excuse for violence.
2. That her safety and the safety of her children are paramount.
3. That she is not to blame for the violence, but the bully.
4. That he cannot change the abuser's behavior.
5. That apologies and promises will not stop the violence.
6. That she is not alone and that she is not crazy.
7. Violence is not a loss of control, but a method by which bullies control others.
8. Violence affects children.
9. Violence is a crime.
It may happen that she doesn't do something right away due to fear and confusion, but be there for her and help her gather the strength to make important life decisions.
