We've all received an unfriendly or rude email full of anger and sarcasm. Of course, this way of insulting is the easiest - people have time to think and write just the right text that will sting where it should. Here are five proven tips and methods to help us respond to rude emails.
1. Calm our emotions and then respond politely.
President Abraham Lincoln had a bad habit in his younger years. He sent insulting letters to his political opponents. When a rival challenged him to a duel, Lincoln learned a valuable lesson - words affect people in ways that the sender can never fully understand. From then on, Lincoln wrote impassioned letters, which he then put away in a drawer. The next day, when the intense emotions had subsided, Lincoln wrote a much more pleasant and polite letter.
We can do the same with email. We can also vent our anger and frustration on the keyboard, but let's save this mail as a draft. When we are rational enough, we edit the message and delete the most impolite parts - or better yet, rewrite a polite email that will make us memorable to the recipient.
2. Let's learn where the limits of virtual humor are.
Some people show their displeasure with capitalized words and angry exclamation points. Others express themselves more subtly, showing their dissatisfaction through sarcasm and satire. The latter is no more emotionally intelligent, it can even be more dangerous, since this behavior is more difficult to detect in oneself. We can easily convince ourselves that this is just a joke.
On the Internet, messages can be misunderstood too quickly, because others do not see our body language, which could better explain our opinion, and such "jokes" and "humor" do not go over as easily as you might think.
READ MORE: Gmail: “Undo Send” – an official feature that prevents an email from being sent immediately
3. Let's not forget that people are still people online.
With only the computer monitor shining down on us, sometimes it's hard to remember that there's a human being on the other end who will end up reading our message. Psychologist John Suler from Rider University discovered that people experience the so-called "no brakes effect" through online communication. Without personal interaction, we don't worry about offending people online. We do not experience discomfort when someone else becomes confused, depressed or angry because of something we have said. That's why we can easily put everything we have in mind on the keyboard.
4. Let's make it known how we feel. 🙂 🙁 😮
Emotional symbols have a mixed reputation in the business world. Some people and even organizations believe that "smilies", winks and other symbols of digital emotions are unprofessional, undignified and belong only in school corridors. The Dutch team discovered that when emoticons are used correctly, we effectively increase the desired tone of the message. Emotional symbols are supposed to serve to a large extent as actual nonverbal behavior.
5. Learn when online conversations should become live conversations.
Communicating online will always be a bit difficult for those who are made to communicate in person. But communication, especially through rude e-mail, is even more difficult for those who are made to communicate online. It is important to realize that long and heated conversations are much better received in person, and also end sooner.
With this amount of communication via e-mail, it is difficult to start a conversation face-to-face, especially when the debate is too heated or it is difficult to continue it online. Online technologies have become extremely useful for fast and efficient communication, but they still have a long way to go before they become the main source for creating and maintaining the quality of human relationships.
