Do you sometimes feel that you lack tenderness and need more attention because your partner is too busy with other things? We would like to spend more quality time with them. Do you want their attention?
Relationships are complex and go through ups and downs - if you've had more attention one period and feel neglected the next, it could just be a lull in the relationship dynamic.
You may feel sad or even resentful of being neglected. You may be afraid that your partner will think that you are demanding and demanding if you demand more attention and time.
But these are legitimate emotional needs, and it's better to communicate them when there's a deficit than to let hurt and dissatisfaction build up and turn into resentment and blame.
Let's look at some ways to get more of their attention
Start an honest conversation about your needs
The first thing you can do to get more attention is to draw your partner's attention to your needs. If you don't tell him what you miss and what you want, he won't notice and feel it the way you expect, and you'll be disappointed and hurt.
Address your partner honestly and directly, this way things can change significantly. When you tell your partner that you feel neglected and that you need more attention and their time, they may be surprised because they may not have known that you feel this way.
He may think he's giving you enough attention, or that watching TV in the evening is quality time—which may surprise you. The surprise on both sides is not at all pleasant, but it is enlightening - the partner did not know that you have unmet needs, and you are giving him information about how things are going.
Take it a step further and tell him (and maybe he'll ask you himself) what he can do. Be specific, because saying you want to spend more time together is not enough. You need to give him clear guidelines, i.e. a concrete problem that requires a concrete solution!
Find out what kind of attention you enjoy the most
Find out what exactly means more attention, that is, what you want. Does it mean you just sit and talk about different topics? Do you want to go to dinner? Is it more physical affection, hugging, holding hands? Is it about planning the future, say a trip, thinking about life together and life plans? What will make you feel that your needs for time and attention are being met?
You should know this before starting a conversation about this topic, and during the conversation you could also consider together what attention and spending quality time means for each of you.
It is important to find out and understand to what extent your needs are different, i.e. similar, so that they can meet and that no one feels deprived.
Ignite the passion
If you heat things up in the bedroom, it's pretty certain that you'll get more attention. It's not about manipulation - sex is an important part of a relationship, because it keeps the organic part of your relationship alive, increases the feeling of closeness, and reminds you of why you fell in love with each other. Make an effort and your partner will definitely appreciate it.
Don't wait for a partner
Are you always available and ready to adapt to his schedule so you don't miss an opportunity to get more of his attention? Don't be so available, relationship experts advise. Live your life independently of your partner, take care of yourself, show him that your happiness and good mood do not depend on him.
No one should be responsible for someone else's happiness. And when you are happy with yourself and your life, it will definitely attract your partner's attention.
Give him more attention
Arrange a date, invite him to a concert of his favorite band or a sporting event. A change of atmosphere can be an opportunity to revive and deepen closeness. Pay attention to his needs and desires, surprise him with small surprises and kindness - when you give him more attention, your partner will be more inclined to return to you.
