The question of why cheating occurs in marriage is one of the most frequently asked and complex questions that couples face. Cheating is an extremely painful experience that can destroy the foundations of a relationship in which we have invested years of love, trust and effort.
Why does cheating sometimes happen?
Every marriage is unique and dynamic and changes and evolves over the years. Sometimes it happens that due to various life circumstances and challenges, partners lose the contact and connection that previously united them.
Family obligations, professional demands and personal challenges can cause you to alienate the partner from each other. This estrangement is often accompanied by unspoken emotions and feelings of dissatisfaction, which can lead to seeking solace outside of marriage—cheating.
Cheating – Cheating is not always the result of a major conflict or unhappiness in a marriage; it is often a gradual distancing, where small but important needs are not being met.
While cheating may seem like a quick fix for momentary feelings of loneliness or dissatisfaction, it can be easy in the long run extremely destructive for everyone involved.
7 signs that there is cheating in the marriage.
1. Lack of attention
In marriage, it is important for partners to exchange verbal and non-verbal cues for attention and support. For example, when one of the partners comes home and wants to share the events of the day or needs help with household chores. The key to a happy marriage is that both partners respond positively to these needs.
Conversely, if one partner ignores the other's needs, problems can arise. For example, while one talks about his day, the other keeps his eyes on the TV or ignores requests for help with the housework.
2. Getting used to rejection
When a partner repeatedly faces rejection, he begins to get used to this feeling. He may feel hurt, sad, angry or isolated, but hides his feelings to avoid an argument. These feelings become more intense each time the person feels rejected again. Partners become less attention-seeking because they expect to be rejected again.
3. Creating the ideal partner
A partner creates an image of an ideal partner in his mind, giving him attention, support and listening. This ideal image is the exact opposite of your current partner. When you got married, each partner believed the other was better than either. But when the thought arises that there are others who are better, the risk of deception increases.
4. Loss of trust
In this stage, the partner stops trusting his/her partner and believes that he/she will never be able to satisfy his/her needs. Emotions such as disappointment, anger and sadness become stronger. The positive qualities of the spouse diminish, while the negative qualities become more and more pronounced. The partner begins to focus only on the mistakes and shortcomings of his spouse, which further worsens the relationship.
5. Quarrels
Partner he starts talking negatively about his spouse, who ignores him. Arguments occur, one side openly criticizes the other. Partners blame each other for mistakes without taking responsibility for their own.
6. Idealization of a better connection
The partner begins to idealize the idea of a better relationship and belittles his current partner. The thought arises: "Perhaps it would be better if we split up." The person already starts looking for alternative ways to satisfy their needs for socializing and sex.
7. Crossing the border
When a partner finally leaves his spouse, he starts looking for other people. He crosses the line and enters into an affair. In a moment of weakness, the partner notices this, which leads to the final reflection - whether it is time to end the relationship or to overcome the deception and reconcile.
When such problems arise in a relationship, it is necessary open and honest communication, no arguments. You should always talk openly about what bothers you, what you lack.
If things go sour in a relationship, it is a better solution is a breakup than cheating. Cheating often means deceiving ourselves that we are in a better situation, but after an affair we quickly come back to reality.
