Have you ever fallen into your own trap? Love can be wonderful. Full of hope. But it can also be your greatest enemy.
Have you ever convinced someone that you were worthy of their attention? Hoped that your love would change someone who didn't even see you? Lost in a repetitive carousel of expectations that were never fulfilled?
If you recognize yourself in this, welcome to the club – and Now it's time to find a way out.
They are in front of you three ways, how you cause yourself heartache – and how you can stop it.
1. You are constantly explaining something to someone who doesn't want to understand you.
First try patience. Then understanding. Maybe even humor. And when all else fails, anger. But nothing works. This person still doesn't hear you, still doesn't understand what's important to you, still acts as if you're invisible.
Reality? If someone doesn't want to understand, you won't be able to convince them.
You can scream, cry, write long essays, or look up new words, but if someone has already decided they won't understand you, then you'll only be wasting precious energy.
The problem is not that you are not clear enough. The problem is that they don't want to hear.
Don't waste any more time. Your words are worth more than endlessly bouncing off walls that someone refuses to break down.
2. Love in the hope that love will change their feelings
This is a trap that good people fall into. You think that if you care enough, if you give more, if you are patient, that person will one day realize how amazing you are. You may have even said to yourself: “Just a little more… just one more piece of evidence…”
But here's the painful truth: Love does not convince, love recognizes itself.
If someone doesn't feel the same way about you, it won't change no matter how hard you try. All you'll end up doing is losing yourself in the process. And how sad is it to give everything to someone who doesn't even notice?
Free up your space. Somewhere out there, there is someone who will love you without the game of proving it. Let them find you.
3. You're going through days, but you're not living them.
Do you remember the last time you felt that real, sincere joy? When was the last time you did something for yourself, not because you had to, but because you wanted to?
Many people don't live - they simply exist. They get up in the morning, do their routine, get through the day, go to sleep at night... and so on ad infinitum.
But this is not life, this is survival.
If you're waiting for the right moment to start enjoying yourself, I have to disappoint you - that moment will never come unless you create it yourself. Don't waste your only chance at life by running away from it.
There are so many things waiting to be experienced. So many moments that could be yours. Why let them pass by?
Final thought: stop sabotaging your own happiness
We often do the most damage to ourselves – without even realizing it. No matter how much we've given, no matter how long we've waited, if something isn't moving, then it's not ours.
Don't persist where you are not appreciated. Don't convince those who don't hear you. And above all – don't let your life slip through your fingers because you were too busy doing the wrong things.
It's time to stop standing still. Step forward and choose happiness.
