A dysfunctional relationship not only affects your relationship, but also your sex life. If you feel disgusted, fearful, and afraid of a loved one, something is VERY, VERY wrong.
In our society, we believe that sex life is the foundation good partnership relations. And if this is indeed the case, then we can say with certainty that the sex life of a couple shows whether they are in a healthy relationship.
Sexuality is something you have to desire. You need to feel relaxed around the person and have the right to speak to express which things you like more or less. And if it doesn't, there's clearly something wrong - but the problem isn't necessarily the other person, even if it's much easier to blame them for the confusion, but it can also be in you. Low self-esteem, fear of commitment, problems with trust... all this can affect your relationship, which then it also shows in bed.
If there's a day you're having desperate sex, it's that day. But if a bad sex life is an integral part of your relationship, it's worth taking some time and find out the reasons, why is that so. Worst of all, bad sex isn't the only indicator of a bad relationship - even great sex, without emotion, attachments and wishes, is MUCH WORSE. And this usually occurs in toxic relationships.
5 types of sex couples in toxic relationships have:
Sex …
…, when you are not in the mood.
In a healthy relationship, partners understand each other. It is completely understandable that there will be days when one of the partners is not in the mood for bed games - he will reject the other and you will still feel comfortable. A partner who would like to indulge his passions will not push, force or compare the current relationship with previous ones.
If you don't want to have sex, you don't have to have it. You cannot force yourself to be intimate and feel intimacy with the person who is forcing you. Find someone who will make you both happy, not walk around angry because you didn't meet their wishes.
..., which does not bring you satisfaction.
If only one partner persistently satisfies his desires while the other suffers, something is seriously wrong. No one should have to sacrifice their comfort and satisfaction for the sake of another person. Such a sacrifice is not necessarily made under duress, but the person himself overlooks his own desires and needs. It is important that you make room in your relationship for an honest and open conversation about everything that is bothering you.
..., in which you show no emotion.
Respecting and following your partner's wishes is just as important as observing his boundaries. If you don't approve of a certain sexual practice that you don't like (handcuffs, anal sex...), no one SHOULD force you to do it. When you begin to perceive your partner as a danger, regardless of whether this manifests itself morally or physically, your relationship can hardly be said to be healthy.
..., which causes you suffering.
If you feel any type of pain during intercourse, do not persist. Also, stop worrying about "disappointing" your partner. There is always another way in which you can satisfy your better half. If you're with the right person, she'll understand.
..., with a partner who criticizes you.
A sexual relationship in which you feel ashamed of your body - it's not about complexes - because of your partner's unpleasant comments because you have small breasts or a small penis, a big belly, crooked legs... is devastating. Words hurt, you learned! Such a person does not deserve to see you naked. Sexuality evokes many emotions, including shame. If you don't love your body, it does not mean that you allow others to despise it.
