When you've been in a relationship for a while, you're definitely not the same person you were when you first saw each other. You are evolving. You are changing. You're transforming into a better version of yourself, and that's a good thing. This means resisting stagnation and staying in your comfort zone.
Nevertheless, you have to keep in mind that there is a difference between "growing with your partner/growing together" and forcing yourself to change to accommodate his ridiculous demands.
If your loved one hates the fact that you're always late, and you've always hated it yourself, of course try to get rid of it. This will strengthen your relationship. You will show your partner that you care about his opinion. And you'll be proud of yourself because of it. The change will benefit you as well as your partner. It will be worth it in the end!
But if your dear person is dissatisfied with something that you really like about yourself, with something that you think is unfair to criticize, then you are under no obligation to change. You should never feel pressured to change into another person. You should not allow your partner to push you into a decision that is very uncomfortable for you. You should never give him total control over what you do with your life!
At the end of the day, every move you make is your personal decision. You control your destiny, your body, your mind. Being in a relationship with someone does not give them complete power over you. That doesn't mean you have to agree with everything he says. They are still two separate people. They are still independent, even though they are now a team.
Your partner would you should encourage you to grow in the areas you are passionate about, but he shouldn't give you ultimatums about what you need to change in your appearance or personality in order to stay with you longer. If he wants to leave, let him. But he can decide to talk to you like a mature person and tell you how he feels. But it shouldn't mean that you change as a person.
And your partner shouldn't want that either! The person you spend your whole life with has to love your looks, your personality, who you are deep down. You shouldn't wish you were completely different.
There is a big difference between a partner who supports you and one who demands things from you. There is also a big difference between someone who only wants the best for you and someone who hides his manipulations with concern for your well-being.
There's a big difference between gradually changing as you grow with your partner, and feeling like you have to change into someone completely different to get them to stay!
