There are many beliefs circulating about love and relationships, many of which are completely unrealistic. Wondering if your ideas about "the one" are correct? Are you worried that your relationship doesn't look like it does in the movies? Then read on as we debunk the myths about love that have very little to do with real life.
We all wish that relationships were as simple as they seem at first glance. To make a partner like in movies and fairy tales knew immediately, what do we need and solved all our problems. However, in real life, unfortunately, it is not like that - it is necessary in relationships to work on a daily basis, present your wishes clearly and work hard for your own happiness. But don't look at it with disappointment: it is the work on it that will make your love stronger and you both happier and more confident. That is why we have prepared 6 beliefs that you must get rid of if you want your relationship to be healthy and stable.
1. You don't have to fight for love
Yes, love is not always easy. Relationships, especially partner relationships, need to be worked on, no matter what improving the virtues of communication or making compromises. It is necessary to build trust and pay attention to what disturbs or hurts our partner. To learn not to react violently every time something doesn't go as planned. Accept not only your partner's best points, but also your shortcomings.
However, you both have to work hard. If you notice that you are the only one putting all your energy and nerves into the relationship, it is worth stopping and thinking about whether such a relationship has a future. Remember, a relationship needs two foundations to function. You can do everything you can, but it won't solve it if you're the only one trying. It's one thing to work on a relationship, it's quite another to do it literally to fight for someone who doesn't know how to appreciate it.
2. "The right one" will know exactly how to love you
We are different from each other. You've probably heard of the concept the five languages of love, developed by Gary Chapman. It means the most to some physical proximity, others encouraging words, and again to the third spending time with your partner. Some will feel most loved when their partner helps with a difficult task, and the rest when from him they receive a thoughtful gift.
Expecting your partner to intuitively know which group you belong to can only bring you unnecessary disappointment. She is the most important in the relationship communication and this is the only way you will achieve being loved in the way you need. Honesty it is necessary and can save you many unnecessary arguments.
3. Love is all you need
Of course, loving each other is important. However, it is by no means enough to make your relationship healthy and stable. Without working on the relationship, conversations, understanding and effort you will expect in vain that your relationship will have a future. Here you should also focus on personal growth, which they tackle both together and individually. Remember: your maturity is the foundation of a mature relationship.
4. You are responsible for how your partner feels
When you love someone, all you want is for that person to feel loved, accepted and happy. You will do anything to bring a smile to her face and fill her with inner peace. But remember: everyone is primarily responsible for their own happiness.
If you're trying your best, but your partner still only focuses on their own problems and acts as if they're your fault, stop. All you can do is behave towards your partner respectfully and understanding. If he doesn't accept it and makes you feel like nothing you do is enough for him, that's it it has nothing to do with you.
It is possible that you and your partner have it completely a different idea about it, how to behave in a relationship. Or he simply takes advantage of your love for taking out his frustrations on you. In both cases, this behavior does not lead to a healthy relationship, so think carefully about the point of persisting in it.
5. Your partner is responsible for you opening up to him
We have all had a painful experience in love, whether it was cheating, a toxic relationship, a disrespectful relationship or even violence. It is very difficult to process such things and trust a fellow human being again without fear. It's normal that after a difficult past you can't open up to your partner right away, but remember that in a relationship you have to share your weaknesses too, and into it don't bring patterns of mistrust from past experiences.
If you feel that you are not yet ready for this step, it is best to take some time to calm down and work on yourself before jumping into a relationship. Even if the partner is "the one", it does not mean that it is not your own responsibility, to learn to open up to him and leave the past behind.
6. They will save each other through love
One of the most common beliefs that comes from fairy tales and movies is that when you meet the "right one", all your problems will miraculously be solved. Yes, it's true that being close to a loved one can help, but we have to help yourself first. Just because we're in a relationship doesn't mean we don't have to work on yourself and in many cases seek professional help. It's unfair to put all your problems on your partner and expect them to solve you, just as they can't expect you to.
Admitting that we need help is one of the bravest things we can do. The person who loves us can only do that to us in such a case standing by.
