You wake up to see dirty dishes in the sink. Calm your nerves, enter the room and find clothes strewn about. You'd rather go crazy and beat him up, but you love him and he's 'yours'. What to do if your partner is messy and doesn't clean up after himself? Give him a chance to do something in that area and improve.
Every couple has their problems. We are all different and have habits that do not suit our better half. And one of these is definitely related to also with organization. You may be used to having everything tidied up like you're in the military, but your better half nothing bothers you dirty dishes, a cluttered apartment or a pile of laundry. This problem is certainly inconvenient, but it exists can be solved!
According to opinion marriage counselor April Masini it's only natural to feel annoyed if your better half doesn't clean up. You probably feel like he doesn't respect you. But the point is that she is simply not interested in cleaning and tidying up. And the only way to change this habit is to conversation, namely it is important to point this out and start to realize it.
Masini says it's best, if you say directly what your frustrations are. It's important to talk about them before you get angry. You need to focus on the problem and not your own emotions. If you only talk about how you feel, you will not achieve your goal. It's also important to pay attention to your vocabulary, says Masini. Avoid being judgmental because you don't want your significant other to feel like you're attacking them.
You must not criticize someone, because he is different from you, says Masini. Rather, point out that you like a tidy home and want to have a partner by your side who will also want your shared home to be clean.
Masini says you shouldn't just pointing fingers at others, but you need to make some change. It is not enough to talk about how important cleanliness is. They will also have to make a realistic plan and formulate strategies that will work. Offer solutions - how they will clean, on what days, in what way, which part of the home. Only then will you be able to find out why isn't your better half cleaning up. And what would you like too was cleaning up.
Masini says there is a chance it will be yours partner resisted. And that's normal, because it's a childhood habit that can't be eradicated just like that. Orderliness is part of his identity, so you need to find strategies that both of you can follow.
