Could he be your father, if not your grandfather? He is having a mid-life crisis and wants to make up for what he didn't experience in his youth. Are you with him for the money? these and similar questions can hit you if you choose a partner who will be much older than you. Does it really matter how old he is? If you love and complement each other, that is enough.
If you are in a relationship where there is a big age difference, there are facts in front of you that you need to prepare for.
Teasers and tough questions
"Did you marry for money? How is your sex life? Do you even have one? And what will you do when he is seventy and you are fifty? What if after a while he leaves you for the younger one? Will he leave you because you will grow old?
All the problems you have are due to the age difference
All couples have their ups and downs, but you are automatically credited with the age difference. That's not true, that's not true! You have to look at a relationship as a relationship between two people, regardless of age.
Expect to have different views of the world, and expect to have disagreements caused by that. However, this does not mean that the source of all problems is the age difference. Communication, compromise and relationship work are essential to any relationship, regardless of age.
How to plan for the future
As much as you live for the present moment, you need to know roughly how the future together should go. How do you imagine a future with him and can you even imagine it? This can be challenging and pose great challenges to your relationship.
Planning is definitely a challenge in relationships, age gap relationships or not. What you need to know is whether there are joint plans or whether there are only unilateral plans. Part of the plans also applies to your views on key issues and decisions.
Jokes
It is almost inevitable that others will make jokes about you and maybe even himself. However, you will eventually learn how to deal with it. What sets you apart from others is yours, privately. Understand jokes as an integral part of your relationship and learn to joke at your own expense.
Talk about kids and planning
One of the biggest problems faced by couples with a large age gap is planning for children. Sometimes it's because your partner has children from a previous relationship or marriage, but sometimes the problem is that one of you can't have children.
However, this should not stop you from your intention if you still have it. Plan your family by discussing with your partner whether they want children and whether adoption is an option. Everything in your relationship is a matter of compromise and conversation.
Opinions of parents and the environment
With all the questions, assumptions and jokes about your relationship, it's impossible to avoid pressure from those around you. The problem arises especially when you have to introduce your partner to his parents, who may be his peers.
The happiness of you and your partner does not depend on others, but on your hard work and commitment.
