Setting boundaries is very important in all areas of our lives: both in the relationships we cultivate with those closest to us and in the workplace. If we don't put them in place, the others will - willingly or unwillingly - take advantage of them and make us feel unheard and disregarded. That's why we've prepared for you 4 signs that you need to set a boundary and ways to do it.
1. You are tense and under pressure all the time
Sometimes ours the body he realizes that there is something wrong even before us. Therefore, we must be very attentive to his messages attentive. Do you think you are strained and under pressure before and after you go to work or catch up with a certain friend? In this case, it is important that you investigate, where could these feelings come from came out.
Setting emotional boundaries means that the people around us we clearly say and show, what are you in a relationship with we won't allow it. It also means the ability to you say "no", if you feel that you will not be able to complete a certain task. Such behavior does not indicate that there are no friends and colleagues appreciated, but yes as well you respect yourself. It will be easier to set emotional boundaries if you are several times a day let it be known, Yes your opinion it is nothing less important from the opinion of others and that you deserve to be heard.
2. You feel resentment towards those closest to you
If you don't set emotional boundaries and don't let people know what kind of behavior you are you don't want to, it is completely normal that you will start to have feelings for them resentment. However, you should be aware that people thoughts just they can't read and that it is expected that - if you do not express this clearly - they won't know, that some of you it disturbs and sadness.
If you are fear or fight with anxiety, we suggest that the setting of borders prepare and first of all decide, what exactly are you going to say. Then be polite, a solid. This means that, for example, you tell a colleague that you would very happy helped, but you already have a lot of work to do yourself, so unfortunately it wouldn't be possible.
3. You have accepted that situations are not as you would like them to be
Yes, it is normal that in healthy relationships we often have to decide for a compromise. However, a sign that you are not setting boundaries is if you notice that you are always only you those who adjust and you accept, that things are not as we would like them to be.
Remember that they are your feelings important and yes you are you earn, that you partner or friend listens and takes into account. Setting boundaries doesn't mean you want to conflicts- opposite. They usually break out after a long time a buried grudge change to frustration.
It is important that you stay kind and respectful and that in setting partner boundaries you are not accusing, but it does focus on your own feelings.
4. You are ashamed or guilty of your own feelings
If you act like your feelings they are not important, it is normal that you will start to feel for them after a certain time guilty. However, you have just like everyone else right, to express your feelings without shame. If you are not used to it, it is normal that it will be difficult for you in the beginning and that it will fill you with nervousness, but keep in mind that setting boundaries is quite something normal and even in healthy relationships urgent.
It will also help you imagine that it is situation reversed. I would be friends resented, if I told you that right now he doesn't have time to talk because she is busy with a lot of work? Of course not, that's why there is no reason, to be afraid to communicate the same on their own.
