Falling in love means risking a broken heart.
If love is a universal feeling, it is also a feeling when a relationship breaks up. When a relationship ends, you feel like you're losing a part of your life. But don't forget, you will have valuable experiences.
Sooner or later, you realize that relationships end because a lesson was meant for you that you had to learn. Ending a relationship leaves scars on you that will always be there. It also enables you to learn about yourself and your view of love.
So what are these experiences you gain after a relationship breakup?
1. Learn why you were willing to settle for less than you deserve
You can make a list of how you deserve to be treated by others. Some people have a hard time establishing boundaries and standing up for themselves in a relationship. After the breakup of the relationship, you will be able to reflect on your actions. You might wonder why you behaved like that? Why did you allow others to treat you this way? Find the answers within yourself.
Think about your relationship. How did your partner treat you? What didn't you like? Think of all the times you felt inappropriate, painful, or uncomfortable. Ask yourself, why did you allow this? Why didn't you stand up for yourself or leave them? Do you lack self-confidence, have a wrong idea about love or get attached too quickly? Find out why, because it might save you from future pain.
2. You will learn that unhealthy love exists
Love is confusing and we don't know exactly how it works. Falling in love with someone does not mean that they will be together forever. It doesn't even mean it has to last forever. You can love someone, but that doesn't mean it's healthy for them to be together, because they can bring out weaknesses in each other.
For some loves, we are thankful they don't last forever. Individuals form their idea of how love works through their parents and past experiences. Some people grow up in unhealthy situations and this also shapes the way they express love in this moment. However, this does not excuse their behavior. Everyone is responsible for their actions. Bad breakups will teach you that their pain is not your burden, especially if it depends on your happiness or safety.
3. You will learn what you do not want in a relationship
Take time for yourself after a breakup. To think about everything you or your partner has done and what you didn't like. There are always aspects of your partner's relationship or qualities that you didn't like. Remember them because they are something you can only learn through experience. Each person you meet helps you learn what you want and don't want in a partner. It is an invaluable life experience.
4. Learn that you cannot change others
No matter how much you love someone, you cannot change them. Every change a person makes must come from him. If you went into a relationship thinking you were going to change the person, you've probably realized by now that it was a fruitless endeavor. Even if you try to change your habits and lifestyle, it is very difficult, but if you force your partner to do the same, such an attempt usually fails. Find a relationship where you don't feel the need to change partners and you'll be happier.
5. Learn that you can survive anything
A breakup hurts. This cannot be changed. Feelings of rejection arise in you. Some even experience physical pain. Between the desire for completion, the feeling of undesirability, a person goes through different periods to leave it behind. That she realizes that this pain has made her stronger.
Learn to manage such pain and prepare yourself for similar situations should they happen again. You might feel like your world is falling apart for a moment, but it won't, don't worry. You will just become different, stronger and ready for new challenges in life.
No relationship is a waste of time. You came into each other's lives for a reason, even if all you got out of the relationship is "just" a lesson on how to be happier in the future. You may still be hurting, but when you're ready, you'll see the lessons that the painful demise of your relationship taught you.