5 steps to overcome jealousy and envy

Jealousy and envy are emotions that are similar mainly in that we associate them with negative feelings in relationships, but most often originate from low self-esteem. The difference between them lies in the fact that jealousy appears when someone we are afraid to lose and we are ready to have a relationship with him to preserve at any cost. Also, many times we perceive the whole world as an enemy who wants this person for us "take". He appears most often in partnership relations.

Envy but it is derived from longings after something which it belongs to someone else. It can be both possessions and anything we see as better than what we have ourselves. It can appear in friendship, business environment or also in connection with people, which ones at all we don't know, but we have the feeling that their lives are better than ours.

Both emotions are completely normal, but over-reaction on it can lead to something that we will regretted. If you think you feel any of them, then read on - here are 5 steps that will help you with these emotions master.

1. Admit how you feel

He gets jealous and envious a lot we are ashamed and them we oppress, because we feel that they mean that we are not a good person. But this is far from the truth. Namely, they represent part of a wide spectrum of emotions that everyone experiences it. If envy you feel when your friend tells you about her success, it doesn't mean you have it like less, but simply that you have to have that emotion to process and find out from where it originates. And that won't be possible if you pretend you don't feel it at all. So the first step is to figure out why you feel so ashamed of envy - you have a feeling that you do it is not socially acceptable or you think it points to negative traits of your character?

Then you are allow to feel. Like other emotions that are not the most pleasant (anger, sadness, feelings of guilt...), jealousy and envy will also came to plan, when you least want to, if you don't process them.

2. Find out where your emotions come from

Try to look at your feelings from as much as possible realistic perspectives. Are you jealous in a relationship because of bad experiences from the past? Then remember that every union means a new story, which does not have the previous one nothing in common. Don't let bad memories affect your present and prevent you from experiencing something beautiful.

Ask yourself how you feel in the relationship here and now - it's your needs and desires completed? Your partner lets you know that he can you trust? You feel with him relaxed and carefree? If you answered yes to these questions, then you have nothing to fear.

If you feel jealous of your friend, it's also best to find a reason for your feelings the cause. You feel bad when you compare yours appearance or lives? First of all, he remembers that everyone has something that they are not satisfied with and that life is no one's life it's not perfect. Instead of her friend, focus on how you can improve your weak points improved or - even better - them fell in love.

3. Work on improving your relationship

He is in a healthy relationship communication urgent. The worst thing you can do is to harbor negative emotions accumulate and a day later they come in shape has already and of conflict. It's important to start the conversation without blaming and you focus on how you feel and where such emotions come from. Through emotional vulnerability you and your partner will build on intimacy and connection, and only then will they be able to determine a solution that will suit both of them. Don't forget: if you don't agree with something, you have to to say clearly, because your partner can't read your mind. According to his reactions but you will also see if he is also ready to work on the relationship.

Conversation is also very important at friendship. Start here too without blaming and instead, tell your friend about something in your life that doesn't make you feel good. Trust negative emotions always helps those who are closest to us, and at the same time, the conversation will remind you that with a friend they are not rivals, but they can work together on accepting ourselves.

4. Avoid rash decisions

The decisions you make in a surge of negative emotions, they can have long-term negative effects. If you think you could react recklessly and started conflict, which you would later regret, it is best to first find a way to you calm down. That's easy recreation, creativity or a conversation with a friend. The conversation will also help you because you will see the situation with another point of view and decided more easily if they were emotions justified. Then, of course, it's time for conversation with a partner.

Avoid reckless actions even if it comes to envy in friendship. If you and your friend are connected strong love and your relationship is different healthy, is the worst thing you can do to a friendship you interrupt.

5. Focus on self-love

One of the most common reasons for jealousy and envy is lack of self-confidence. If you are confident in herself and with you satisfied regardless of your shortcomings, the possibility that you will feel this emotion is distinct smaller.

To get to good self-image it's not the easiest, but anyone who is willing to work hard can succeed - including you. Remember yours good qualities- so personal as those relating to yours appearance. Then repeat to yourself that no one is perfect and you are what you say you are deficiency something that makes you unique. You can also raise your self-confidence by working on the qualities that you are not satisfied with and that you can you change.

It is also important to realize that your partner's behavior it's not up to you. A mature person will not solve dissatisfaction in a relationship by cheating, but conversation. If you have bad experiences from the past, that it doesn't mean anything, that there was something wrong with you and that you don't deserve someone to love you respected and appreciated.