Did you know that by April 80 % not all New Year's resolutions are fulfilled? Why? Because breaking bad habits is hard work. It requires both commitment and action.
Breaking bad habits is hard work. First, find a compelling reason to replace your bad habits with good ones. Second, identify the thoughts or beliefs that are preventing you from changing your habits. Third, find good habits that you find enjoyable so you can break the cycle of bad habits.
1. Go deeper into the real reason for giving up bad habits
When you create a goal or intention to stop a bad habit and replace it with a good one, what do you tell yourself is the reason for the change? That we should do it or that we would like to do it?
No one likes to be told what to do, so if you create new habits out of a sense of duty, your chances of failure are pretty high. But if you really want to break your bad habits with a good reason, that good reason will motivate you to follow them more consistently.
Also, words like “must”, “try” and “maybe” reduce your chances of continuing. Instead, use words like “I will” and “I want” to tell your brain that you're committed to it.
2. Discover your fear and excuses
Once you have a strong motivation to change your bad habits, you need to discover what made-up stories or beliefs you tell yourself might be holding you back from making the change.
We are masters of excuses, especially when we want to justify not doing something.
If you don't believe you have the time or energy to do something, you won't find the time or energy to do it. If you think something is the only way to feel relaxed, nothing else will work.
When you recognize the fabricated stories and beliefs, reverse them and tell yourself the opposite. Write down new thoughts and stories and read them regularly until you believe they are true.
3. Transform your plain loop
Even if you are highly motivated and have good intentions, breaking bad habits can be difficult. Why? Because you like to choose what is most comfortable for you at that moment. When you find good habits that you also find enjoyable, it becomes easier to break the cycle of bad habits and change your life.
But how? Look at the course of action and reward process you go through for each habit you have.
Good habits may not feel so good when you do them, but how do you feel later or the next day after you've chosen a healthier habit? Did you sleep better? Do you have more energy? Do you feel proud of yourself?
Once you start training your brain to enjoy the reward of a good habit instead of a bad one, it becomes easier to break the loops of bad habits.
4. Pay attention to the rebellion within you
There's a reason you follow new habits for a while and then go back to bad ones. The brain does not like change and starts to resist. You may feel guilty for having good habits. Or you may have friends who envy our change and wish you could not succeed.
5. Help from a partner
Even if you are a motivated person with great motives and intentions, there will be days when going back to old habits looks pretty tempting. These are the days when you need an accountability partner, someone you can call to remind you why you're doing it.
6. Continue until it starts working
Changing habits takes time, but if you don't enjoy your new habits, breaking them will be tempting.
When you replace a bad habit with a good one, make sure you enjoy the good habit. No one says you have to stick to a good habit if you don't like it. Try other good practices until you find what works for you and motivates you not to pick up a bad habit.
7. Small, manageable steps
People don't learn to ride a bike or swim overnight, and changing habits is no different. Trying to make too many changes at once increases the likelihood of failure.
Break your new habits down into small, manageable steps, and once you've done one, move on to the next. Celebrate the small victories along the way.
