Why don't smart people hold grudges? Wisdom that every man should read!

Feeling offended and resentful they can go on and on, but their shackles don't let us breathe. We can ease the resentment by we try to understand its essence and start living a simple life, which is an incredible luxury. This requires daily work and effort. But it pays off in the end!

Where does the feeling of anger come from?

Dissatisfaction arises, when someone doesn't meet our expectations. However, these expectations are often in vain.

• We expect a loved one to realize on their own that we need their help and attention, and we don't think we need to talk about it.
• We expect our child's father to remember on his own when the child has to go to kindergarten or school, and we are offended that he forgot all this.
• We expect our parents to help us raise our children, but they say they raised their children on their own.
• We expect our friend to understand all our problems, but he is busy solving his own.

There are more examples, and with each of these there is unjustified hope and ultimately bitter disappointment. The more we expect something, the longer dissatisfaction will hold us.

Where do expectations come from?

People who are often offended and hold grudges unconsciously believe that they have to others get at least halfway.

• The husband must bring coffee to bed every morning.
• Children must listen to their parents and study hard.
• Friends should always help us through hard times.
• Parents must love and support their children.

When things start happening against our desires, we are experiencing great disappointment. There are often reasons for this we are looking beyond the actual problem and we almost always find something. But it is unlikely that we will really understand at this moment where the real reason lies.

To summarize: when we are offended, we are hurting ourselves because we expect other people to give us what we could not give ourselves.

Here is a story to help you understand this better.

One day a disciple asked his spiritual master: "Master, you have managed to decipher the Great Wisdom, you are always in a state of complete peace and good mood. No one annoys you, you are not angry with anyone. Teach me to become like that myself.” The spiritual teacher answers him: "Okay, I'll teach you, but for that you need one bag and a potato." The disciple did everything the master told him to do. "When you get angry with someone or something, write that person's name on a potato and put it in a bag," said the teacher. "Is that all I have to do?" the student asked in confusion. "No, you will always carry this bag with you wherever you go. And every time someone makes you angry or insults you, you will add one potato to the sack,” replied the teacher. The student agreed.

Some time passed, and the student's bag gained weight. In addition, the first potato began to rot, and an unpleasant smell emanated from the bag. The student came to his teacher and said to him: "I can no longer carry this burden and stench with me. Give me something else.” To this the wise teacher replied: “Do you also carry something else in your soul when you are offended and angry with other people? Once you are insulted, you do not notice that a stone has fallen on your soul. Over time, these stones accumulate. Actions become habits, habits become character, and all of these lead to immoral behavior. I gave you a chance to look at it from the outside. I think you'll think twice about whether you really need another stone. An insult is something that is in your head. Learn to free your head from this stench of rot and become a truly happy person.”