Men and women speak the same language, but that doesn't mean we understand each other.
Research showed that words and phrases can have different meanings for each of us. That's why sometimes we can't communicate without arguing. But if you're willing to put in some mental effort, you can learn how to communicate better with each other and save yourself some misunderstandings in the long run. And that with just a little bit of psychology.
It's in front of you 12 tips that will help you have better relationships with other people.
Women: don't read between the lines
They exist evidence, that women read more than what is written in the messages. In other words, they "read between the lines" and attribute the value of intimacy and closeness to their partner's words. Men, on the other hand, are more consistent and expect the center of the conversation to be on a certain topic. For example, a man says: "Today we have a match!" it means exactly that and no "I'd rather be with my friends than with you!" If you understand what each of you expects from the conversation, it will be easier for you to bridge the differences.
Men: don't advise, just listen
Don't say:"See what you don't understand...", but, "You just don't understand why..." Women tend to see communication as a way to explore feelings and comfort from partners. Men have a habit of thinking about clear solutions, advice and want to deliver them as quickly as possible. He wants to give advice, and she wants to be heard.
Women: appreciate that he wants to comfort you; men: show you care
Men will see a problem that needs to be solved. They will show concern for their partner by investing their energy in solving the problem. This means that they will analytically research various problem-solving tactics and try to communicate them to the woman. Meanwhile, the woman is only looking for an attentive listener. Men really could helped to the woman by asking her some questions or by making her feel that she is being listened to (perhaps through non-verbal cues).
Women: Understand that men enjoy their own time too
Men are often accused of being uncommunicative or withdrawn. Women could gain a lot from understanding the reasons for this behavior. If a man seems somewhat isolated, it probably means that he has taken a break from his problems. This time can be in the form of silence, watching TV or reading. Don't be afraid of it, give it space!
Women: Try to be more clear about your intentions
Women and men differ in how they say things to each other. Women are slightly more indirect than men, tending to avoid direct accusations. Therefore, it would be best for women to be more specific and to delve deeper into what they are actually talking about they talk. Instead of saying: “I'm angry about what you said at dinner,” will be sarcastic: "Maybe we should think about behaving nicer on our dates."
Men: Make sure she knows you're listening
Partners with each other they differ by their communication styles in verbal responses, physical and eye contact. In general, men will not pay attention to whether they are making eye contact or other verbal cues with the person they are talking to. Women, on the other hand, place a strong emphasis on constant feedback to make sure both sides are engaged in the conversation.
Women: try to see the task as just a task; men: add some romance to the task
Women get involved in the implementation of the task in such a way that they first build trust with people through conversation. Men tend not to date for trust and instead rush to accomplish the task. Both sides have the same goal in mind, but in different ways.
Women: Understand that men often have to do something while they talk
Men tend to work during communication, and the activity itself is central to fostering a sense of being able to open up emotionally. Meanwhile, women feel closer to a man while speaking. Men wants something to do before or even in the middle of an argument. The woman wants to discuss everything immediately!
Men: don't hesitate to ask for help
Men may feel that the need for help is a reflection of their inability or vulnerability. Women perceive counseling as a sign of caring for someone else. If you want to to bridge this gap, it may help to be as clear as possible about your intentions.
Women: Be aware that men are selective listeners
They try to find solutions to problems. They listened they will only be around long enough to learn what they think is necessary to find solutions. On the other hand, women show greater respect for verbal and non-verbal cues and may be offended when they are absent.
Women: Don't let your anger build up
Men process the problem and move on, while women see each argument as part of a larger whole. In other words, men are perfectly fine if they argue about a certain topic, let it go, and move on to another topic without giving much thought to the former argument that remains in their minds. The woman, however, will probably transfer her anger to the next conversation.
Women and men: Accept your partner's communication style
It is important to recognize that people (regardless of their gender) have different ways of communicating. Some are more direct in their communication. Others less so. Some like to listen, others like to talk. So remember, your partner is unique.
