No matter how brave you are in facing uncomfortable truths and clearing up murky situations, you're probably in no rush to talk to someone right away about what's hurt, angered, upset, or worried about you. Don't be in a hurry!
You wait a little cool down. Give yourself some time think about it and clarify the situation. Wait for the right moment. This gives you time to distance yourself from the problem and achieve a more objective view.
If you do not know how to distance yourself, dissatisfaction and emotional charge can accumulate in you and lead to the fact that when you finally speak, you do it excessively harshly and aggressively.
Prolonged procrastination can turn into resentment, which poisons and undermines relationships.
Perhaps you are putting off such a conversation in the hope that the need for it will disappear? Are you pretending to wait for the right moment, but in reality you are afraid to enter this sensitive story? You're afraid that something you don't want will come out.
These are sure signs that you are putting off difficult but important conversations!
You fear challenges
You want to be right, but you are not sure that you will have enough arguments to present your vision as the only correct one. You wish you could convince the other person of the correctness of your opinion, but you are no longer so sure that you are right.
The conversation can end with you feeling defeated and embarrassed. It means that you are not sure what you really think about the subject and that you do not have a clear position that you can take without fear of coming off as shallow, selfish, thoughtless.
You may have made some decisions that you feel are good for you, but others will oppose them. You don't know how to get them, so you put off the conversation.
But in doing so, you're actually delaying knowing what's good for you, and the sooner you face the expected disapproval, the sooner you'll find out if you really have the power to accomplish what you set out to do. It is a process and it will not be completed unless you start it.
You are afraid of being judged
Maybe what you want to say will cause others to roll their eyes, raise their eyebrows, make sarcastic comments. They may fear and distrust you. It won't be any different now either, you won't convince them in one conversation that you have changed and that you are serious now.
Find those people who support, understand and trust you, and their support encourages you. Ignore those who judge you, no matter who they are, even if they are the ones closest to you.
You hope the problem will resolve itself
The most common reason for procrastinating and postponing confrontation is the hope that the problem will somehow resolve itself. Sometimes it turns out that your fears about confrontation were unfounded - for example, instead of telling your friends or parents that your plans for a holiday together have changed, you keep quiet. But more often than not, the problem grows until it puts you in a situation where you just have to deal with it. Your indecisiveness puts others in trouble.
You are constantly apologizing unnecessarily
If apology is the most used term in your vocabulary, it means that you carry feelings of guilt and insecurity and that you are afraid of being rejected. It is a problem of self-esteem and lack of awareness of one's own worth. Work on building self-esteem and resolving emotional trauma.
