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Dear heart, I'm sorry I didn't take good care of you

I'm sorry for hurting you and forgetting you so many times. I love you.

I'm sorry I didn't love you enough. I'm sorry for always putting you through hell and expecting you to be happy and peaceful. I'm sorry because I promised you that I would never hurt you again, but I broke my word. I'm sorry I don't take care of you like I should.

I'm sorry I was thoughtless. Because I don't stop you when I know you're going to get into trouble. I don't warn you when I can clearly see the red signals. I don't always tell you the truth. I'm sorry if sometimes I feed you the lies you want to hear.

I'm sorry I didn't learn enough from my mistakes. I'm sorry for putting you through the same situation over and over again. I'm sorry for exhausting you and asking you to do more than you can. I'm sorry for filling you with pain and sorrow instead of love and joy. I'm still learning my lessons and I'm sorry you have to go through all this and go through the pain with me.

I'm sorry that sometimes I ask you to settle for much less than what you really want. Much less than what you deserve and much less than what you truly love. I'm sorry I only gave you bits and pieces of love. I'm sorry I put you in a position where you can't really give it your all. I'm sorry for all the half-hearted love you've received.

Dear heart, I am sorry that I did not learn enough from my mistakes.

I'm sorry I wasn't honest with you. I'm sorry for not protecting you or guiding you the way I should have. I'm sorry I didn't give you a perfect world to live happily. I'm sorry you had to go through all this with me, but you're still here. You still believe in me. You still listen to me. You still trust me. You're still blindly following me. And I owe you the world for that.

I promise you that from now on you will always come first. You will have a special place in me, there will be everything you really wanted and more. There will be no lack of love that you have always wanted. I will repay you for every little cut and every little gash I have caused you. I promise it will be the kind of love that will heal you. The kind of love that conquers all. At which you will feel that you have never been wounded or broken.

I promise I won't give you away so quickly next time. You were patient. You were kind. Strong. You suffered more with me than anyone and you still believe in me. And because of that, I won't let you down again.

You deserve the world. I learned my lesson. I promise you that the next time I take you on another trip, we'll go home. To the home you were looking for. Where you revive all the beats that have died in you. Where you fill all the emptiness that surrounds you.

Trust me, I mean it this time. It's the least I can give you. You've spent enough painful and stressful days with me and now it's time for us to be each other's greatest love. I love you.

With you since 2004

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