Do you find yourself repeatedly attracted to the wrong, toxic partners? Are your relationships filled with emotion, but always end too quickly and in an extremely painful way? If you answered yes to the question, then it's time to address the reason why you keep ending up in an unhealthy relationship. We asked what the experts think about this topic and how to get rid of the patterns that draw you towards the wrong partners.
After completion toxic relationship many people feel painful disappointment above themselves: it is not clear to them how they could be in such a relationship at all found out and how it is possible that they are missed the signs, that something is wrong. But the truth is, it is unhealthy patterns still too easy to accept or next to them feel at home, if we are used to them from own childhood.
That's why experts advise you to find out what it is a play about love, which you acquired in your early years and heal the wounds, which prevent you from choosing healthy relationships over toxic ones.
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A play about the love we acquire in childhood
Childhood it's time we gain beliefs, which they then we hold subconsciously in adulthood. If we grow up in an environment where we are constantly surrounded by conflicts and we get the feeling that it is love associated with pain and sacrifice or that we will only receive it if you are we earn, then it may happen that we will similar dynamics also sought in partners. A toxic relationship will give us a sense of homeliness, as it will confirm the beliefs held by our subconscious.
So don't think you are stupid or naive, if you have signs of toxicity at first overlooked: the child in you felt like he was around them at home.
Another reason you are attracted to partners who are unable to give you healthy love, it can be that deep down you believe that you are you don't earn. Even such thinking usually comes from childhood: if in your early years you kept getting the feeling that you are not worthy of love, it is completely expected that you will have loving relationships avoided.
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How to change patterns?
Toxic samples from childhood do not in any way mean that you will not be able to find a partner who will be you appreciated and loved exactly as you are. However, you must first have false beliefs recognize and learn what it is and how it expresses itself healthy love. The easiest way to do this is with to an expert, but they can also help you books and videos, which are touching philosophies of relationships.
It is important to clear up with yourself that love doesn't hurt and that they must not accompany her under any circumstances insults, violence, punishment, giving up closeness… True love it is not transactional: by no means is it true that your partner only gives it to you when you are it "earn". Experts also advise you to work on your own self-image and you begin to believe that you are worthy of love and that the right partner for you is by no means a person who will not be able to give it to you. Instead, you will listened, considered yours borders and contact you daily tried. And when you feel deep down that you are such a person you earn, you will also notice that you have toxic patterns they no longer attract.