Why is it harder to get over a breakup with a friend than a fling?

So why can the end of a friendship be more painful than the end of a relationship?

Don't talk about why it ends

Sometimes friendships end because of betrayal, but usually friendships end for no reason. Maybe you live far away from each other, or you've simply become estranged over time. Relationships cool down quickly. Friendship dies. In relationships, the relationship is broken from both sides and that is the end of the story, this is not the case with friendships.

You are not grieving

Since there is no breakup, you cannot mourn the loss, as you expect to meet again in time and continue the friendship. So you don't know if you lost the friendship or not. And sometimes you experience a pain that is very similar to the pain of breaking up with your partner. Sometimes friends leave, for no reason. This confuses and frustrates us.

You need someone to talk to

When you're dealing with any kind of pain, especially emotional pain, you want to turn to someone you trust. You usually turn to your friends. But if they're the ones you're losing, it's hard to find someone else to talk to.

You have a strange feeling

There is a kind of unspoken rule that friendship should be easy. When you lose a friend, you might feel like you weren't a good friend, because friendship is supposed to last forever.

Friendship doesn't happen overnight

All friendships start with strangers and it takes a long journey to become best friends. You share many memories with them. There are things only they can understand.

With him you could be who you are

You are not always completely open in your relationships. You tend to feel more comfortable with friends and trust them because you are bound by the past. Losing good friends with whom you could be who you are makes you feel bad.

See also

Partnership

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Are your secrets still safe?

Friends are people you usually confide in and don't really think about ever losing. But when the friendship ends, you can't be sure that your secrets will still be safe with them. If a friendship ends in a bad way, you may even fear that they might take revenge on you and tell others.

Social life

You share many things with your friends and one of them is your social circle. While one friendship may no longer work, another in the same circle of people still does. This means you'll still be seeing your exes and things could get weird. Maybe even your mutual friends would decide to side with your ex. And that would be very painful.

You feel like you're alone

Since no one really talks about a friendship breakup, it can be easy to feel very isolated. You might feel like you are the only one in the world who is going through such a situation. You would feel as if you have not only lost "someone else", but a person who really supported and listened to you.

Friendship doesn't grow on trees

When a short-lived relationship breaks up, there's always someone there to encourage you and tell you that one day you'll find someone better. It's not the same when a friendship breaks up. It took years to build what you had in common.

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