Being friends with your ex is sometimes a good idea and sometimes not.
You ended a relationship some time ago and are wondering if friendship with your ex is even possible. Although the idea of being friends with someone you've spent part of your life with seems tempting, in some cases it's extremely inadvisable. Namely, it raises questions about emotional boundaries, past grievances and possibilities for genuine platonic relationships. Check in which cases it is friendship with ex a good idea, and in which not.
Friendship with an ex: a good idea
Platonic feelings
A friendship with an ex will be more successful if both parties truly share platonic feelings. If the romantic aspects of the relationship have naturally transitioned into a deep, non-romantic connection, the foundation for a healthy friendship may already be in place.
Aligned goals
Shared goals and aspirations can be a solid foundation for maintaining a friendship after a breakup. If you and your ex share common interests, hobbies, or career goals, continuing your friendship can provide a supportive space to pursue joint endeavors.
Mutual support
Healthy friendships thrive on mutual support, and this principle also applies when it comes to being friends with an ex. If both individuals can offer emotional support and understanding without the complications of a romantic relationship, the friendship can be extremely rewarding.
Friendship with your ex: bad idea
Abuses
Trying to be friends with an ex becomes problematic if the relationship was marked by abuse. Either physical or mental. In such cases, prioritize your well-being and keep your distance, as this is crucial for your mental and emotional health.
Betrayal
If there have been lies, cheating, or other betrayals in a relationship, rebuilding trust between friends can prove challenging. It is essential to assess whether there are foundations for a healthy friendship after such serious abuses of trust.
Romantic feelings
Trying to be friends with an ex becomes complicated if either party still harbors romantic feelings. This situation can cause emotional confusion and can hinder the process of making friends.
As a source of comfort
Seeking friendship with an ex just for comfort or attention is generally not recommended. It is essential to differentiate between genuine friendship and emotional dependency to ensure a healthy post-breakup dynamic.
An attempt to prove
If you're trying to stay friends with your ex to show that you've moved on or that you're fine without him, you're being driven by ego, not real connection. Genuine friendships are built on sincerity, not the need for validation.
