How can you gain the trust of someone you want to build a strong relationship with? Have you ever thought that you could take inspiration from the methods used by secret service agents? No. Here are six key methods that agents like the FBI use to gain trust that we can apply in our everyday lives.
It's trust foundation stone every successful interpersonal and professional relationship.
Agents of secret services, such as the FBI, have developed complex and effective methods in the process of their work methods of gaining people's trust and affection, not only to gather information, but also to build lasting relationships that support their missions.
Ranging from psychological approaches to practical communication skills, these methods have become reference point for understanding, how everyone can win the trust of others in their life and profession.
Psychology professor Jack Shafer specifically highlighted some techniques that agents have developed that can be used in everyday interactions.
Communication. Photo: Fauxels / PexelsListening without judgment
It is a fundamental method for building trust. This means active listening with the aim of understanding and evaluating the perspective. In practice, this means that agents should not make judgments or jump to conclusions while listening. Instead, they need to show that they truly appreciate and understand what the other person is saying.
This includes maintaining eye contact, nodding and other body signs that show you are engaged in the conversation. Asking open-ended questions that encourage the person to share more information and paraphrasing or summarizing what is said to show understanding.
Listening without judgment allows a person to feel heard and understood.
Empathic responsiveness
This approach emphasizes the importance of understanding and responding to emotions other people. It is the ability to empathize with the emotional state of another person, to understand theirs motives and we react in a way that shows compassion and understanding.
Observing non-verbal signals such as facial expression, gestures and tone of voice, which help to understand what the other person is feeling. Using communication skills such as responding with empathic statements that clearly express understanding of the other person's feelings. They must show a genuine interest in the well-being and emotional state of the other person.
Empathic responsiveness enables the building of a deeper psychological bridge between individuals, because when people feel that their feelings are recognized and appreciated, they are more inclined to trust and open up. This method is especially effective in tense or conflict situations, where empathy can reduce tension and promote positive outcomes.
Can you listen? Photo: Elevate / PexelsMirroring and coordination
Mirroring and coordination are techniques used by secret agents to establish and strengthen trust, so that unconsciously coordinate their behavior, body language and verbal communication with the interlocutor. It creates a sense of connection and communities, which can significantly contribute to the development of mutual trust.
Mirroring it involves repeating another person's body language, gestures, expressions, and sometimes speech patterns. This should be discreet so that it does not appear imitative or unnatural.
Coordination refers to adapting your tonal register, speaking rate and vocabulary to that of the person you are communicating with.
These practices help create a sense of comfort and reduce the psychological distance between individuals. When people perceive similarities in behavior and communication, they feel more connected and therefore more trusting.
Personal Disclosure
It is a technique that encourages reciprocity in personal disclosure, which can lead to a deeper emotional connection and trust.
Personal disclosure is not just about sharing positive experiences or successes, it also includes admitting one's own insecurities, fears or mistakes. This approach allows the interlocutor to see the human side of the agent, which can reduce psychological barriers and encourage a stronger mutual connection.
Positive reinforcement
Positive reinforcement is a technique, with rewarding and recognizing other people's positive behaviors and achievements. This approach is based on a psychological theory that suggests that positive feedback encourages the repetition of a desired behavior.
Listen actively. Photo: Rdne stock project / PexelsUsing positive reinforcement creates a positive environment where people they feel valued and motivated. Positive reinforcement can effectively improve interpersonal relationships and encourage positive responding, which is critical to successfully navigating complex social interactions.
Common goals and values
This approach is based on the idea that people naturally gravitate towards those who have similar interests, beliefs and values. Shared goals and values create a sense of unity and belonging, making it easier to build and maintain trust.
This process not only fosters trust and cooperation, but also enables better understanding and respect between individuals, which is crucial for successful long-term cooperation.
Trust – Building trust is a key element of all successful relationships.
