Ask yourself - can you get intimate without crossing the line and falling in love?
Can you observe someone you are intimate with flirting with others? What will happen if one of you falls in love with someone else? How often will you meet? Will they each go their separate ways after sex, or would it be acceptable if they slept together? Will your relationship be a secret or will you tell others about it?
Set rules that both of you must respect and stick to!
There are some advantages to getting physically close to someone you already know. But there are more pitfalls. Without clear and open communication, you risk getting your emotions involved in situations that will destroy your friendship.
Friends with benefits is a definition that denotes a platonic intimate relationship, without commitment or romantic partnership, and with occasional sex. It's not for everyone. Some enjoy committed, romantic relationships, while others fail to achieve such a connection and surrender only physically.
Before you decide on such a relationship, check what you should accept and what you should avoid.
What are the advantages of such a relationship?
Where are the benefits of "friendship with benefits"?Let go of restrictions
In such a relationship you have freedom, nothing holds you back from being faithful. You still enjoy all the benefits of being single. You meet others, you are looking for a person for a long-term relationship. At the same time, you have someone for occasional companionship and sex.
Increased self-confidence
Having a physical relationship with someone you trust can boost your self-esteem. In this way, you learn how to enjoy yourself on a sexual level. Once you are comfortable with them, you are ready to explore your sexuality and your body in different ways.
Things are already working
Intimacy with friends can happen quickly. You share a common energy, otherwise you wouldn't be friends at all, and the step to sexual chemistry is short.
They are honest with each other
Because you don't have the added expectations of a romantic partnership, it's often easier to open up and be frank, and within the framework of the agreement. You don't feel like you're letting them down or ruining their dreams by being honest. Don't feel like you have to be there for them, that you owe them your body, time, or energy. It's easier to be honest because you know from day one that the relationship could end tomorrow.
Clearing emotional baggage
One of the biggest hurdles in any relationship is overcoming emotional baggage. In such a casual relationship, you give it up entirely. Serious feelings and expectations do not belong in casual relationships. Skip the ramblings about the past and exes and focus solely on the physical relationship.
Freedom to explore sexuality
It involves a certain sexual liberation that is hard to find in any other relationship. They don't need to impress each other, which makes it easier for them to experiment.
Safety and respect
Developing intimacy with someone you already know comes with a certain level of safety and mutual respect. Of course, this does not mean that you are immune to sexually transmitted diseases or safe from pregnancy. Be honest, open and honest with each other.
What are the disadvantages?
Where are the disadvantages of "friendship with benefits"?Jealousy
It's that beast that can turn your world upside down at the most unlikely of times, when you involve emotions or don't trust each other. When you make assumptions and build expectations, it can lead to jealousy and hurt.
Destroying self-esteem
Such an attitude builds trust in you in more ways than one. If a breakup destroys a friendship, you feel unloved and unsupported. If this friend turns out not to be as ideal as you imagined, you are disappointed in your judgment. It may happen that you start to doubt yourself.
Friendships get complicated
Friendships get complicated, even if you and your "friend" try to keep things discreet. But "word gives word" and it can cause the collapse of your relationships with other friends who do not approve of your relationship.
The value of friendship
Because these friends are important to you, you become emotionally attached to them. Even though you can't love them like a romantic partner, you still want the best for them. In a way, you want to be loved. When these feelings become too strong, you risk falling in love. You start making compromises, which eventually leads to discomfort.
Blurred boundaries
Although many people think they can separate their emotions from physical attraction, it is very difficult to do so. Physical contact involves your emotions, whether you like it or not. When you inevitably bring emotions into your relationships, things quickly get complicated and rational decision-making is no longer possible.
A complicated breakup
Friends are the foundation of your happiness, and the breakdown of these relationships can seriously jeopardize your happiness. Drama also spills over between mutual friends, family and the business sphere (if they are colleagues).
No show of affection
Long conversations fall away when they look into each other's eyes and just hug each other and say gentle words to each other. All messages, surprise dinners and small attentions are gone. There are no shared holidays, no joint vacations. You're actually lonely, even though you have someone you don't actually have at the same time.
Don't expect your physical relationship to turn into a romantic one. What they share is not romantic love. Learn to separate sex from expectations and save them for someone who has the same life goals and values as you.
