He would - you wouldn't. You would - he wouldn't. How to coordinate? In long-term relationships, it is inevitable that a partner's sexual desires will occasionally be out of sync. This is completely normal and nothing to worry about unless it persists and becomes a serious stumbling block in the relationship
When this happens, a problem arises, which in the professional literature is called inconsistency of sexual desires. This problem is relatively common, so every fourth couple faces them.
There are a few things you can do yourself to fix this problem before seeking professional help. In the following lines, we will offer you three suggestions.
Discrepancy in sexual desires is a problem of both partners, not just one
It's very important to look at the discrepancy in sexual desire as something you and your partner need to work on, and not start blaming them for wanting to make love to you often or rarely. The next thing you need to do is to analyze the problem you are facing by checking if either of you have health problems that are reducing your sex drive.
Also, take a look at your past lifestyle and try to see if there is anything in it that is reducing your desire for sex. Do you have too many obligations and are more tired than usual? Have you recently started a family and don't have the energy for your partner because of childcare? The answers to these and other questions can help you get to the bottom of your problem.
Communication is key
One of the most common reasons why sexual desire is inconsistent is the fact that one of the partners does not feel pleasure during lovemaking. How to fix this? Very simple - communication. Explain to your partner what turns you on and what bothers you during sex. If he listens to you and implements your suggestions, you can expect greater enjoyment of intimate moments, and later an increase in the desire for sex.
Sounds simple, right? Unfortunately, many couples do not know how to communicate about this issue in the right way, so they inadvertently deepen the gap between them and make life together much more stressful than it should be.
Start planning sex
Maybe you don't find the idea of planning sex with your partner appealing because it supposedly kills the romance and you feel that the act of making love should happen spontaneously. This is a false belief. There's nothing wrong with agreeing on a date with your partner to go to bed together, and it also has its advantages.
When you know in advance when you will have sex, you can plan your day with this in mind and make a schedule so that you are not too tired before the scheduled appointment. In addition, you have the opportunity to flirt with your partner until the selected date, thus raising the sexual desire of both of you, without fear that in the end someone's needs will not be met.
