"There is no man who cannot do significantly more than he thinks he can." - Henry Ford
The theory of learned helplessness is confirmed by life. Fifty years ago he was American psychologist Martin Seligman launched the idea of free will. Seligman found out experiment on dogs according to Pavlov's scheme of conditioned reflexes. The experiment would probably be strongly condemned today, but at the time other and different legalities applied.
The goal was to form a fear reflex to the sound of the signal. Every time a loud sound was heard, the dogs would get an electric shock. In order not to escape prematurely, they were tied with a special belt. Seligman was convinced that when the animals moved behind the low fence, they would run away as soon as they heard the signal. After all, a living being would do anything to avoid pain, right? But in the new cage, the dogs just sat on the floor and whined. No dog has ever jumped the smallest hurdle—never even tried. When a dog that did not participate in the experiment was put in the same conditions, it escaped easily.
Seligman thus concluded that when it is impossible to control or influence unpleasant events, a strong feeling of helplessness develops. In 1976, he received the American Psychological Association's Award for Discovering Learned Helplessness.
What about people? Seligman's theory has been tested several times by scientists from different countries. It has been proven that if one is systematic:
- is defeated despite all efforts;
- he goes through difficult situations in which his actions do not affect anything;
- finds himself in the middle of chaos, where the rules are constantly changing and every step can lead to punishment - his will and desire to do anything at all - disappear. Apathy comes, followed by depression. The man gives up.
How to resist chaos? What if learned helplessness is already conquering your inner self? Is it possible not to give in and give in to apathy?
Method no. 1: Do something
Whatever. Psychologist Bruno Betelheim he survived a concentration camp with a policy of constant chaos. He said that the management of the camp was always introducing new prohibitions, often meaningless and mutually contradictory. The guards put the prisoners in situations where any action would lead to severe punishment. Under this regime, people quickly lost their will and broke down.
Betelheim suggested an antidote— do what is not forbidden. Can you go to bed instead of talking about camp gossip? Go ahead. Can you brush your teeth? Wash them. And not because we want to sleep or take care of hygiene, but because in this way a person takes subjective control back into his own hands. He has a choice: to do this or that. Second, in a situation of choice, he can make a decision and execute it immediately. Your personal decision, which you make yourself, is important. Even a small measure becomes a vaccine against vegetation.
The effectiveness of this method was confirmed by others in the 1970s. Ellen Langer and Judith Rodin conducted the experiment in places where people are most limited in their freedom of movement: a prison, a nursing home.
What did the results show? Prisoners who were allowed to arrange furniture and television programs in their own way became less susceptible to health problems and outbursts of aggression. The elderly, who were able to furnish the space according to their taste or grew plants, thereby increased their vitality and slowed down the process of memory loss.
The way to deal with helplessness is: do something because you can. Make a list. Choose what to do before bed, what to cook for dinner and how to spend the weekend. Arrange the furniture in the room in the way that suits you best.
How does this help us? Remember Seligman's Dogs? The problem wasn't that they couldn't jump the hurdle. It's the same with people: sometimes the problem is not in the situation, but in the loss of will and faith in the meaning of actions. Approach "I will do it because I decided" maintains or restores a subjective sense of control. This means that the person is moving away from this difficult situation.
Method no. 2: Away from helplessness - with small steps
The thoughts you have about yourself “I can't do anything”, “I'm worthless”, “My attempts won't change anything” they are formed from the past. You, like in the game, "connect the dots."“ and you choose some stories. Change your beliefs about yourself. Over time, a person pays more and more attention to the experience that confirms this belief. And it stops seeing exceptions.
The good news is that beliefs about you can be changed back in the same way. This is done with narrative therapy: the person, together with the therapist, learns to see alternative stories, which eventually merge into a new game. Where there used to be a story about helplessness, you can find another: a story about your value and importance, about the meaning of your actions, about the ability to influence what is happening.
It is important to find specific examples in the past: When did I succeed? When could I influence something? When did his actions change the situation?
Being is also important attentive to the present – small achievable goals will help you. For example, clean the kitchen cupboard or make an important call that you have been putting off for a long time. There are no goals too small - they all matter. Did you succeed? Is it? Absolutely! Victory should be celebrated! It is known that where there is attention, there is also energy. The greater the emphasis on achievement, the stronger the fuel for a new victory. You are more likely not to surrender.
Set small, realistic goals and be sure to celebrate them. Keep a list and read it at least twice a month. Over time, you will notice that your goals and achievements have become bigger. Find an opportunity to take each step with some joy. Over time you will think about yourself, "I am important", "My actions are important", "I can influence my life."
Method no. 3: A different look
Seligman discovered the problem and later devoted his life and career to finding solutions. He discovered that animals can learn to resist helplessness if they have previous experience of successful actions.
The dogs, who were initially able to turn off the electricity by pressing their heads against a board in a fenced enclosure, continued to look for a way out even when they were tethered. In cooperation with well-known psychotherapists, Seligman began to study human behavior and their reactions to external circumstances.
Twenty years of research led him to the conclusion that the tendency to interpret events in one way or another affects whether we look for an opportunity to act or give up. People with the belief that "bad things happen because of my fault", will more often develop depression and a state of helplessness. Those who think they do "bad things can happen, but it's not always my fault and sooner or later it will stop", they find their way faster and come to their senses in difficult circumstances.
Seligman proposed a schema of reframing: examining experience and restructuring perception. It's called “ABCDE scheme”:
A – Problems, unfavorable factor. Imagine an unpleasant situation that triggers pessimistic thoughts and feelings of helplessness. To begin with, it is important to choose situations in which you do not rate more than 5 on a scale of 1 to 10.
B – Conviction, conviction. Write down your interpretation of the event, what you think about the event.
C – Consequences. How did you react to this event? How did you feel about the process?
D – Problem, another look. Write down evidence that challenges and refutes your negative beliefs.
E – Energization, revitalization. What feelings (and possible actions) create new arguments and more optimistic thoughts?
Try to refute your pessimistic beliefs in writing. Keep a diary to record unpleasant events and prepare them according to the ABCDE scheme. Read the notes every few days.
What can it do for you? Stressful situations will always arise. But with time and practice, you can learn to fight anxiety more effectively, resist helplessness, and develop your own successful response and behavior strategies. Energy that previously served pessimistic beliefs will be released and can be invested in other, important areas of life.
It is important to remember that there is no one-size-fits-all solution that will definitely work for everyone. Man and his life situation are more complicated than the most thought-out and detailed schemes. Sometimes even independent work gives the desired result. And sometimes you need to seek help from a professional.
It is especially worth seeking professional help if:
- you have difficult experiences and rate them as 7 or more on a scale of 1 to 10;
- you are depressed, nothing is going well for you;
- you started working independently, but you feel worse in the process;
- the feeling of helplessness increases, and negative self-images are strengthened.
Trust your feelings and take care of yourself and your condition.
Seligman's dogs had no choice. You have it!
