In a relationship, it often happens that unhealthy patterns from our childhood come to the fore. Because we learned then that a certain way of behavior is correct, we imitate it in adult life, which can have an extremely negative impact on our relationship. And one of the very common negative patterns is sacrifice, that is, constantly giving without receiving. We asked what such behavior looks like and how to break the vicious circle.
Ours childhood has an extraordinary impact on relationships in adult life strong influence. If our early years were full joy, sympathy and carelessness, we have the greatest chance of experiencing these emotions in adult life as well. However, many people bring from childhood trauma, which are usually also accompanied negative behavioral patterns.
One of the most common patterns is sacrifice in relationship, which may at first glance look like generosity and conscientiousness, and in the long run it wears negative consequences, which can lead to toxic relationship.
What is sacrifice in a relationship?
Sacrifice in a relationship manifests itself in the way that one of the partners assumes the role of the one who always gives, and in return receives much less. This person does agrees with every desire of the partner, even if he feels it inside disapproval or shame. Partner for help she never asks: since she learned from childhood that such an act indicates impotence. Also time for yourself he doesn't take it: he has too much money for that guilt.
Sacrifice in a relationship has a negative impact in the long run because the person who is always giving soon feels down overloaded and unheard of. Because he believes in himself that he is love is conditional with how much it will be to the partner offered, lives in constant of fear, that it will not be enough for him.
A relationship in which someone suffers, of course healthy future does not, so it is very important that such behavior recognize and Mrs overcome.
How to stop sacrificing?
If you feel like you are took over the role the one who always gives, we advise you to look for it first the cause. Many people behave this way because they were forced to take over as children the role of a parent and take care of your brothers, sisters or even parents. Some have adopted this pattern also because they are from their parents received love only when you are supposed to "deserved".
It is important to realize that such behavior he was not fair and that you don't need yourself and your life completely to subdue partner in order to receive his love. It's a healthy relationship equal: both partners must each other to help and each other's feelings to listen.
So pay attention to yours feelings and try to be them in a gentle way shared with a partner. If you feel overloaded, instead of harboring a grudge against him, trust. Also be careful to take care of own needs. Both partners are the foundation of a healthy relationship also happy with herself, so don't feel guilty if you take it time for yourself. You also don't have to feel guilty if your partner ever you say "no". If with any of his wishes you don't agree or you are too tired, in order to tackle some task, him that tell me: you must realize that taking care of yourself is far from selfishness.
It's also important to exercise in a relationship setting healthy boundaries and to come to the realization that love it is not conditioned with constant giving. A partner who truly loves you will not be from you expected, to arrange a price for it own health.
Exercise too receiving. In a relationship, it is completely normal for a partner it helps neither do you, and there is no reason why you should feel it when you ask for help guilt. You should know that you are you deserve love and a man who will be ready for you stand by and which will be yours to him emotions matter.
