While critics write obituaries, Tesla is making profits that its competitors can only dream of without advertising and with a "toxic" boss. If the headlines of business newspapers in 2025 were written solely by the editors' feelings, you would probably think that Elon Musk is currently begging for change on the corner of a factory in Berlin, while the CEOs of Volkswagen and BYD drive by in golden carriages. The narrative is clear: "Tesla is old, Tesla is stagnant, Tesla is finished." But Tesla 2025 is officially the biggest miracle in the automotive industry 2025.
Let's be honest. The automotive industry has become a bit... depressed in recent years. All the manufacturers are competing to make the angriest, heaviest, most expensive electric behemoth that takes up as much space on the road as a small studio apartment. And then there's Citroën. The brand that is apparently the only one that still drinks real wine during lunch breaks. They've introduced the Citroën ELO. It's not a car. It's a mobile living room that devoured a McLaren F1 and decided to live in a Decathlon. And you know what? It's absolutely fantastic.
Some cars and trailers aren't made to get us from point A to point B. They're made to transport us to another era. And the new Airstream? This one will take you straight to the middle of Yellowstone, except you'll be the one with a more comfortable bed than Kevin Costner.
In the name of aerodynamics and range, all-electric SUVs have started to resemble bars of soap that you left in the bathtub for too long. And just when we thought BMW had scooped up all the cream with the new iX3 Neue Klasse (which was unveiled just a month earlier!), Mercedes threw a brick at the table. But what a brick! The new Mercedes-Benz GLB is square, proud, and looks like a scaled-down GLS that just came out of the gym. It's a car for those who want electric but don't want to look like they're driving a space capsule. And to be honest, with its new platform and crazy specs, it threatens to steal the Bavarians' lunch before they can even unwrap it.
Let's face it, the world has become painfully boring. In Europe, we're talking about electric scooters, recycled straws, and how vegan our dashboards are. Meanwhile, in Brazil, a country where "safety distance" is an urban myth and where roads are often just a loose suggestion on a map, Mitsubishi still knows what the word "car" means. They've unveiled the 2026 Mitsubishi Triton Savana. This isn't a city crossover that's afraid of the curb in front of the kindergarten. This is a machine that looks like it could chew up a Toyota Prius and spit it out in the form of a recycled cube. And the best part? Only 80 of them were made. And no, you can't have one.
In 2026, buying a car is no longer a question of emotions, the smell of gasoline, or the roar of the exhaust pipe. It has become a question of an IQ test and the ability to use a calculator. If you are buying as a company, you are crazy if you do not buy electricity. If you are buying as an individual and live in a house, insisting on gasoline is the same as burning banknotes to heat your neighbor's apartment.
Volkswagen is at a turning point. After several years of searching for an identity in the electric age, criticism of the software and ergonomic slippages in the interior, it seems that the German giant is returning to what it has always done best: making cars for people. In sunny Portugal, the Volkswagen ID. Cross 2026 concept was revealed to selected eyes – a car that promises to correct the mistakes of the past.
Let's be honest. Electric motorcycles have so far fallen into two categories. The first is those that look like kitchen appliances on steroids and have the charisma of a toaster. The second is those that cost as much as a studio apartment in Ljubljana, but you can't even get to the sea on them without reading War and Peace while waiting at a charging station. But it seems that the Barras brothers from Hong Kong have finally found the holy grail with their new project BBM Hiro Streetfighter. Or at least a very good approximation.
The Lexus LFA was like a starburst—bright, beautiful, and damn short. If you were living under a rock in 2010, you missed the car that sounded like angels playing trombones while falling down stairs. Today, my dears, the LFA is back. But before you pop the champagne, I must warn you: Yamaha is no longer in the orchestra. The new LFA is electric. Does this mean the end of the world or the beginning of something that will melt our faces?
Everyone is shouting about a revolution. YouTubers are swooning over the charging curves. But let's be honest - when you walk up to this car in person, when you actually see it without studio lights and filters, something unexpected happens. Nothing. Your heart rate stays steady. Instead of being overwhelmed by a sense of German dominance, you are overwhelmed by a strange "déjà vu". Doesn't it all seem a bit too... Peugeot? The BMW iX3 Neue Klasse is a monster on paper, but in reality it may just be proof that "premium" is no longer what it used to be.
Let's face it, the automotive industry has become a bit... sterile lately. All the manufacturers are competing to see who can fit a bigger TV in the cabin and whose car will be quieter than a library. And then there's JAS Motorsport and Pininfarina. They decided enough of this nonsense was enough. They took a legend, put a carbon suit on it and left it with what we men really want: a manual transmission and an engine sound that makes the hairs on your arms stand on end. Meet the JAS Motorsport Tensei.
Let's be honest, for a moment, between us. We've all done it. The phone vibrates, the red light seems to last forever, and the hand slides to the "forbidden fruit" in the center console. Until now, this act has been haunted by a bad conscience and, in Tesla's case, that pesky in-cabin camera screaming at us like a hysterical math teacher. But Elon Musk, the man who would probably try to colonize the Sun if he had enough sunscreen, has just changed the rules of the game. Or at least he thinks he has. His latest tweet (sorry, "post on X") claims that you can now officially type in your Tesla. But before you open Tinder in the middle of the highway, read the fine print. Because the devil - and the cop with the ticket - is always in the details. So - Tesla FSD.











